Last week I spent a few days in Colorado at a youth ministry retreat called Wilderness, put on by Christ In Youth.
This is an incredible weekend each year, and is a time for me to renew, refresh, and refuel my relationship with God. It’s something I won’t miss because it’s so beneficial to my life right now. You can read more about my thoughts on Wilderness here and here.
In the past, I’ve always driven to Colorado, camping out a night or two along the way. However, with our move to Florida, that became impossible. So I flew.
I don’t fly often; it’s just not something that I need very much. And with a large family, it gets expensive fast.
But this time I flew.
The trip out was uneventful. But my experience on the trip home gave me some things to think about.
The Transportation Security Administration stole my toothpaste.
My toothpaste.
Before I left home, I checked my airline’s website for what I could and could not bring with me. According to their website, I could carry on up to 17 ounces of personal products, such as shampoo, deodorant, and toothpaste. I checked most of my personal items, but I wasn’t sure what the lack of air pressure would do, and I really didn’t want toothpaste on all my clothes for the week, so I packed it in my carry-on with my shampoo.
Going to Colorado was no problem.
Coming home was.
TSA pulled out my toothpaste, all four ounces of it, and told me that it was larger than the permitted size. The lady was nice about it, but it still bugged me a bit. I don’t use a common toothpaste; mine is all natural and fluoride free, and so it’s a little more expensive.
TSA told me that since it was more than the permitted 3.4 ounces, I had two options: I could check my backpack, or I could mail it to myself.
Checking my pack wasn’t an option, since my laptop, Kindle, and the books I needed on the flight were in there. Mailing it too myself didn’t appeal either, as that would require exiting the secure area,and going through that long line all over again.
In my mind, I had two additional options. One was that she could just let me have my toothpaste. But I didn’t suggest that. i didn’t want to make her mad. My other option was for her to simply drop it ion the trash can at her feet. She did.
I proceeded to pass through security, sans toothpaste.
While laughable, and I had a good chuckle with a couple of the other guys over it, this gave me a few things to think about.
In my mind, this experience relates well to youth ministry. I can think of at least three key similarities.
Consistency
I carried the same tube of toothpaste on both legs of my trip, headed to Colorado and headed home. TSA in Florida didn’t see the need to take my toothpaste. Which is good, because my breath would have been atrocious in a day or two. However, TSA in Denver felt the need to take my tube of toothpaste. I think some consistency is needed. Either way, really, I don’t care. If it’s not an issue, let it go. If it is, then take it from me. But don’t send conflicting messages, which is what they did.
Youth ministry is the same way. We must maintain consistency in our ministries, whether that is in our teaching, or in the areas of structure and discipline, or in our own personal life. What we say must reflect what we do, and what we do must reflect what we say. Without consistency, the students in our ministry will receive conflicting signals, just as I did in my travels.
Perspective
I realize that TSA has a tough job, and one that is usually thankless. I’m not complaining about them at all. I completely understand where they are coming from. But here’s a bit of advice. Don’t see threats that aren’t there. A couple of quick questions would have probably satisfied the agent, and I could have kept my toothpaste. I mean, after all, it’s just toothpaste. Ok, I know, someone could use just such a disguise for something else. I know that. But in the bigger picture, I was obviously not using it for that purpose.
Perspective in youth ministry is crucial as well. In my ministries, I’ve dealt with some tough kids. But understanding their circumstances went a long way towards understanding why they acted the way they did. I’ve ministered to teens who have been abandoned by their parents, teens who had an abusive boyfriend or father, teens who were dabbling in drugs and alcohol, and many other situations. Every time, maintaining the proper perspective helped me to be more effective as a minister.
Humor
In the end, I had to laugh. First because this TSA agent was doing all of this over an ounce or two of toothpaste. Second, her face when I suggested that she just throw it away was amusing as well. I don’t think she expected that. I can’t imagine how she might have reacted if I’d simply suggested that she overlook it. (Actually, I can, and every scenario I can envision doesn’t end well for me…) But after we all cleared security, we sat in the food court and had a good laugh about it all.
I’ve seen a trend in my life, and in other youth minsters as well. We tend to take ourselves too seriously. That has to stop. The stress added to my life, the arrogance of such thoughts, and the simple boredom of a life with little or no laughter are all reasons to lighten up. One of the ways I keep my sanity in a busy ministry is to be able to see the humor in any given situation. Maybe not right at first, but at some point, I want to be able to look back and see something that I can enjoy. After all, joy is one of the fruits of the spirit.
In the end, I made it home safely, and enjoyed seeing my family after being gone for five days. And a tube of toothpaste isn’t that big of a deal in the big picture. Is it?
What other similarities can you see between this situation and youth ministry? You can share your thoughts in the comments section below.